What is shyness? Does shyness exist?
In my opinion, there is really no such thing as shyness. Shyness is just an explanation to why you are and excuse to prevent you from socializing with others, because you are not socially skilled, and thus you tell yourself you are shy.
For people who are shy, I believe that as when they were like most little kids, they were naturally care-free, playful, curious about the world, uninhibited (except by the parents), and just about everything else the opposite of shyness.
But some how down the road, something happened that caused them to become more reserved, either because of family, other kids messing with them, or whatever it was that started it. That lowered their interest to be social, and thus their social skills were never developed as a youngster.
Every time they engaged themselves in social interactions, they weren’t having a good time as other people because they were not as good socially, and eventually develop social anxiety and so avoided human contacts as much as possible but told themselves they were just shy to justify it.
Look not all of us had social upbringing in a positive supportive environment where it was conducive to be social, either it could have been our influence from our friends, immediate surrounding, parents restricting us or over-sheltering us, etc.
But whatever the case may be when you have the right skill sets and your social toolbox filled with social mojo like your stories and your witty one-liner repertoires (I called this your sociability), you will naturally be comfortable and confident in your social gathering environment.
The reason why you experienced social anxiety is because you haven’t done it enough before and not used to it, it is unfamiliar; therefore, don’t have the right tools built up from experience to handle it.
When your brain is implanted with the tools and you have plenty of social arsenals under your belt, you no longer have that social anxiety because you know what to do.
For learning all the tools to building your social arsenal toolbox to becoming the most social person you can be, check out my Art of Social Natural, where I not only give you the tools but practically show you how-to-use them.
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